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E S S A Y S
E N V I R O N M E N T A L
... F E N C E
FUN PLYWOOD CACTUS FENCE ENHANCEMENT, Spring '07
Two years ago I painstakingly wood sealed or painted all my
fences. Two sections of my property have narrow slatted fence that was
old when I bought this property in 1983. My property is land locked,
the fence is needed mostly as a visual barrier so I didn't replace the
elderly brittle dried out wood fence other than a few slats here and
there.
Enter development, new neighbors where there had been Scrub
brush. The neighbor dog lives to bark at me and charge my fence hoping
to break through and eat more than just my tennis shoe. The newer fence
handles their charges but the elderly fence slats near my outdoor tub
began to break. YIPES. This is my outdoor tub area. I'm frequently
not dressed for fending off attacking dogs. Not dressed at all.
Looking over the fence to the North I clearly see and hear neighbor guys
drinking a few beers and hanging out evenings and weekends. I need
several square feet of a sturdy dog barrier and a visual guy barrier for
my tub area.
TIME FOR JOY'S FAMOUS and FUN PLYWOOD CACTUS FENCE ENHANCEMENT!
I hauled out the sawhorses I found on the roadside a few years
ago, a sheet of scrap plywood retrieved from an alley, and a few 2x4. I
removed nails; wire brushed the wood and bounced it around a bit to
remove dust. I primed the wood and immediately poured on gray and green
paint using large curved strokes with a paint roller. When the paint
dried I drew large prickly pear cactus and taught myself to make rough
curved cuts with a power circular saw. I hold the saw guard up for
these cuts making sure I keep my legs and femoral arteries well to the
side of any, heaven forbid, saw back lash. I cut tighter curves and
smaller cut out areas with my saber saw. I rounded up small scraps of
wood and cut extra prickly pear pad shapes and blossoms out of the very
small pieces.
Late evening found me painting all the edges. And with all
those curves and cutouts I looked forward to enjoying painting all those
lovely edges for hours. Lots of edges. Lots and lots of little and
big curves, gentle and sharp curves. Lots of hours. After the first
glass of wine I remembered the large long plastic tray I use for deep
soaking my plants. Retrieving this tray from my shed I sloshed in a
half inch of paint and dipped in the edges of the wood cactus pieces and
used a brush or my finger to move the paint to the areas that didn't
dip. I sloshed another glass of wine and kept painting with brush,
fingers what ever. Why not use up the paint in the tray by getting a
start on contouring the cactus, adding dark shadows and light edges on
the side that would be south, light green dark green, electric blue,
gray. I love painting. Layers of paint colors dry brushed over each
other are eye candy. Might as well paint the blossoms Wow is it 11:30
PM, is the wine bottle really empty? I hope I like these colors
tomorrow in daylight as much as I like them now by wine and drop light.
Probably will. I like everything now, good day’s and evenings work.
Ah, the peaceful quiet, a cool dip in the tub and bed. Stretched out
after midnight I wondered about these colors painted by drop light and
wine filters. Will they work in daylight, or will I wake up pad out
with my first cup of coffee and think
“WHAT HAVE I DONE?”
Should brushes carry a warning label,
do not operate after drinking alcohol...
Gad, am I really wide-awake at 5:00 am? Oh coffee please.
Outside air is fresh almost cool, hard to believe it was 104 yesterday.
Great the colors are all great. Standing the plywood up on edge I
paint any spots I missed in the dark and make sure the top edges are
well painted, all holes filled with caulk and painted over so rain won't
soak in. I turn it over up side down and check more edges, Looks good
with just a little touch up.
Time to stretch extension cords and gather drills with bits and
Philips head screws. I installed the two by fours to the fence frame
and balanced the colorful sheet of plywood on 5 gallon buckets. Gad
it's heavier with layers of paint soaked into the old dry wood. I use
Budweiser lids for screw washers; otherwise the screws drive right
through this old dry wood. With a lot of eyeballing and standing back I
finally decided on the best position and attached the colorful cactus
shaped plywood to the two by fours mounted on the fence. Later I added
the extra prickly pad pieces to change the contour of the plywood to a
more natural plant shape. This evening I'll extend the illusion of
cactus even more by painting more cactus pads and shadows on the
surrounding fence.
Other than a few new screws I repaired the old fence upgrading
it to DOG PROOF, created more height and privacy and painted a
wonderful cactus backdrop for my outdoor tub. I used salvaged plywood
and two by fours wood and left over paint destined for the landfill. I
sent no old fence to the landfill, bought no new fence requiring new
trees death and the pollution inherent in wood processing and
transportation. I even picked up littered Budweiser bottle lids from my
neighborhood to use for washers.
Total new materials:
Screws
Caulk
and wine. Wine optional.
It's A GREEN FENCE in every sense.
It's an art fence.
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